a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
