cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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