Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
