Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
