just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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