I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
