she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
