hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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