Please, let me fuck your mom
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Randomize
