This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
