You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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