When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Randomize