So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
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I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
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okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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