because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
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I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
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Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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