If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize