we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
