Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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