im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.