Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Someone signed my nipple.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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