How'd it feel making her break her religion?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I want to be your penis for a week.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
