he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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