I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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