They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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