sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
ttyl tear gas
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
