And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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