We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
