wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
