Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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