I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
