So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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