Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
3pm strippers are depressing
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
