why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize