So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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