Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
