you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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