watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
