Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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