how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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