I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
