But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
