i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
The beer is more important than you right now.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
