is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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