the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
