hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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