Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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