he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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