And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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