'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
