if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize