My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
