How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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